So yeah... first comment of the entry. live journal blows ewok ass. damn ewoks. damn "sex" key.
the more i think about returning to those white wall the more knots i get in my stomach. a sick sinking feeling. i know seth, its just a place to sleep. but i still have to be there. alone. i been alone there for 2 months now. just now it's worse. he got to escape. or run away. how did he get so lucky?
and i am left with white walls. thinking about it doesn't make it easier. i like it at my rents. its calm here. i can have my friends over here. that will be nice i guess. to have people over again. maybe the walls won't looks so dark.
its ok, january isn't that far away. i don't know if 5 days was enough time to prepare for the responsiblity i am obtaining. i would have liked to plan but oh yeah... my feelings don't matter.
well even if that the case and i have no reason to have my feelings- they are still mine and you were still my friend. and it still hurts to know how much shit you have put me thru and here i sit. in the dark. alone.
geneseco is too far for a hug. i think i'm in need tho. i have one day left. then its those walls again.
maybe i should find the bright side to all this... ::pauses to think:: um. no.
houses get lonely in the wee hours of morning. think i'll make some ramen.
p.s. thanks for the talk seth.
p.s.s. HAPPY 20TH BIRTHDAY JOEL!!!!
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